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Monty Python and the Holy Grail – Bridge – Three Questions

Monty Python Holy Grail

Monty Python

Monty Python and the Holy Grail - Bridge - Three Questions

Bridgekeeper: Stop. Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
Sir Lancelot: Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper. I am not afraid.
Bridgekeeper: What… is your name?
Sir Lancelot: My name is Sir Lancelot of Camelot.
Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest?
Sir Lancelot: To seek the Holy Grail.
Bridgekeeper: What… is your favourite colour?
Sir Lancelot: Blue.
Bridgekeeper: Go on. Off you go.
Sir Lancelot: Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
Sir Robin: That’s easy.
Bridgekeeper: Stop. Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
Sir Robin: Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper. I’m not afraid.
Bridgekeeper: What… is your name?
Sir Robin: Sir Robin of Camelot.
Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest?
Sir Robin: To seek the Holy Grail.
Bridgekeeper: What… is the capital of Assyria?
[pause]
Sir Robin: I don’t know that.
[he is thrown over the edge into the volcano]
Sir Robin: Auuuuuuuugh.
Bridgekeeper: Stop. What… is your name?
Galahad: Sir Galahad of Camelot.
Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest?
Galahad: I seek the Grail.
Bridgekeeper: What… is your favourite colour?
Galahad: Blue. No, yel…
[he is also thrown over the edge]
Galahad: auuuuuuuugh.
Bridgekeeper: Hee hee heh. Stop. What… is your name?
King Arthur: It is ‘Arthur’, King of the Britons.
Bridgekeeper: What… is your quest?
King Arthur: To seek the Holy Grail.
Bridgekeeper: What… is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
King Arthur: What do you mean? An African or European swallow?
Bridgekeeper: Huh? I… I don’t know that.
[he is thrown over]
Bridgekeeper: Auuuuuuuugh.
Sir Bedevere: How do know so much about swallows?
King Arthur: Well, you have to know these things when you’re a king, you know.
[the Black Knight continues to threaten Arthur despite getting both his arms and one of his legs cut off]
Black Knight: Right, I’ll do you for that!
King Arthur: You’ll what?

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Planes Trains and Automobiles – Singing Three Coins in a Fountain – 2018

Planes Trains Automobiles 2018
Planes Trains and Automobiles - Singing Three Coins in a Fountain - 2018

Planes, Trains and Automobiles” is founded on the essential natures of its actors. It is perfectly cast and soundly constructed, and all else flows naturally. Steve Martin and John Candy don’t play characters; they embody themselves. That’s why the comedy, which begins securely planted in the twin genres of the road movie and the buddy picture, is able to reveal so much heart and truth.

Some movies are obviously great. Others gradually thrust their greatness upon us. When “Planes, Trains and Automobiles” was released in 1987, I enjoyed it immensely, gave it a favorable review and moved on. But the movie continued to live in my memory. Like certain other popular entertainments (“It’s a Wonderful Life,” “E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial,” “Casablanca”) it not only contained a universal theme, but also matched it with the right actors and story, so that it shrugged off the other movies of its kind and stood above them in a kind of perfection. This is the only movie our family watches as a custom, most every Thanksgiving.

Source: https://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/great-movie-planes-trains-and-automobiles-1987
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Casual Trump, Rally Trump and Prompter Trump

The Three Types of Trump Voters – Dave Pell
The 3 Personas of Donald Trump-Morning Joe MSNBC Oct 2018 MSNBC

A clip from Morning Joe on MSNBC interviewing Anthony Atamanuik on the key to playing Donald Trump in Comedy Central’s The President Show.  Anthony reveals:

  1. Physically Trump  has three main body postures;  act like you have no gravity, keep your arms up, moving and waving all the time, and when you turn crane stiffly like an animal.
  2. Mentally you should abandon all logic, morality, and any sense of order.
  3. His three main personas are Casual Trump, Rally Trump and Prompter Trump.

The Three Types of Trump Voters

The Three Types of Trump Voters
The Three Types of Trump Voters

“And how worried you should be about each of them.”

  • The Apprentices

  • Canaries in the Coal Mine

  • The Enraged

The Apprentices: These folks admire Trump’s celebrity, his certainty, and his bluster. They don’t know much about the issues, so Trump’s habitual lying and refusal to learn the basic details about even a single subject is not something they particularly care about (or understand). He says he can solve the problems. Sounds good. They are, in a way, the voters America deserves. Celebrity-obsessed near-imbeciles who want Trump to win because he’s TV’s best show (although it was a lot funnier before they got rid of Little Marco and replaced him with that fat guy who just stands in the background looking like he’s about to throw up). He’s the show they can’t stop binge-watching. And come on, having Melania as the co-star is a major plus. For these voters, Trump’s presidency will be measured not against history, but against other forms of televised entertainment. And by that standard, there’s little doubt this will be the highest rated show on TV.

Danger Level: The existence of these folks can’t come as much of a surprise. Yes, the awareness of them depresses you every election season, but you can usually repress the bulk of your memories by Thanksgiving, and forget they even exist by Christmas. And fortunately, they can be easily distracted by other shiny objects. Worst case, we need to find someone funnier and with better cutdowns. Think President Jeffrey Ross.

Canaries in the Coal Mine: These folks have watched their fellow Americans on the coasts ride a tech, finance and real estate rocket ship, while their mortgages are underwater, their jobs have gone overseas or been automated, and the awareness of their critical value to the country has been systematically diminished. I’m a coal miner from Wyoming or West Virginia. For generations, my family has been powering America; literally providing the fuel that drove economic revolutions. And now, not only is my business shrinking, I’m being told by all the environmentalists, billionaires, and Hollywood types that my industry has been poisoning the world. That my sacrifices, my hard work and health risks, my father and grandfather, are all part of some historic wrongdoing. You have no damn idea how the rest of your country lives and works. You’re worried about climate change? I’m worried about dinner.

Danger Level: These people actually have a point. They’re just expressing that point through the wrong candidate.

The Enraged: These folks are pissed. You got your black community-organizing president. But then you had to stick it in their faces with the gay marriage, the political correctness, the stories that make our cops look bad and our criminals look like victims. F you and your political correctness, your self-righteousness, your gender BS, your Academy Award racial obsession, your thin skin, your campus trigger warnings, and all that shit about Caitlyn Jenner. This has gone far enough. Close the borders. Build the wall. And let’s remind everyone whose damn country this is. In general, these folks run the gamut from harboring an unconscious negative disposition towards members of certain demographics, to a whole-hearted embrace of good old-fashioned racism. In other words, they fall along a spectrum that runs from Archie Bunker to Benito Mussolini.

Danger Level: Look, I’m not gonna kid you here. Steam is escaping the pot, and it’s not unthinkable that the lid could blow off. And let’s be clear; Mitt Romney and David Brooks are not going to convince these folks with calm, reasoned arguments. You can’t push people to the limit for three decades and then reel them back in with a few speeches. It wasn’t unpredictable that we’d see a backlash to the historic breakthrough of the first black president and the long-overdue adoption of more progressive social values. It’s less predictable how that backlash will play out in the long run.

Go to the profile of Dave Pell
Dave Pell
For More from Dave Pell and the unrated version  of this article visit
The Three Types of Trump Voters – Dave Pell 
Source: Morning Joe - MSNBC, Dave Pell
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The Three Umpires

Give me a break ump!

Three Blind UmpiresThree Blind Umpires

One weekend the junior umpire, the senior umpire, and the master of all umpires got together to discuss their craft.

After hours and hours of deliberation and thoughtful discussion, the junior umpire stands up and he says “I call ‘em the way I see ‘em“.

The other umpires nod, but then the senior umpire stands up and he says “I call ‘em the way they are”.

The room is silent. Finally, the master of all umpires says “Gentlemen, they ain’t nothing till I call ‘em”.


The Three Umpires by Norman Rockwell
The Three Umpires by Norman Rockwell

Tough Call – also known as Game Called Because of Rain, Bottom of the Sixth, or The Three Umpires – is a 1948 painting by American artist Norman Rockwell, painted for the April 23, 1949, cover of The Saturday Evening Post magazine.

Robert M Woods

Among the many conversations I have had with Great Books students over the years, none is more lively than when we discuss various theories of truth.

It seems to always come up when we are reading and talking about Thomas Aquinas’s Summa. In order to make immediate connection with them, I tell the story about three umpires in a bar after a game. These officials are discussing what really happens when they call balls and strikes. What they are really doing is discussing the relationship between reality and human apprehension of said reality.
The umpires are discussing the relationship between the pitching of the ball and the calling of said pitch by the umpire. It goes like this:

1) When it comes to making calls behind the home plate, I call it the way it is….
2) When it comes to making calls behind home plate, I call it the way I see it….
3) When it comes to making calls behind home plate, it ain’t nothing until I call it….

1) Is it possible that this umpire would ever admit to being wrong?

2) Is the reality of the ball and strike rooted in the perception of the umpire?

3) What if the pitcher threw the ball twenty feet over the catcher’s head and it struck the press box and the umpire called it a strike, it would be, but he would be fired–why?

Those of us who have played or enjoyed the game of baseball get the import of this conversation. The truth is that it is easy to hear what each is saying and recognize the legitimacy of their respective claim. Additionally, it is also relatively easy to extrapolate from their statements and expand them to the point of seeing how wrong they are in their claim.

Source:http://www.theimaginativeconservative.org/author/robert-m-woods

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Knowledge is Good

Knowledge is Good
Knowledge is good, John Belushi, Animal House
Knowledge is good, John Belushi, Animal House

National Lampoon’s Animal House is a 1978 American comedy film ….. Like ABC’s Delta House, Brothers and Sisters lasted only three months.  

When they arrive at college, socially inept freshmen Larry (Thomas Hulce) and Kent (Stephen Furst) attempt to pledge the snooty Omega Theta Pi House, but are summarily rejected. Lowering their standards, they try at the notoriously rowdy Delta Tau Chi House, and get in. The trouble is, the college dRelease date:July 28, 1978

Animal-House-Knowledge-is-Good-Beginning-Sequence
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Dead Pan Humor

Steven Wright

Dry humor with a blank expressionless face. This type of humor is common among shy and socially indifferent people. Includes other elements of humor ranging from shy humor, sarcastic even macabre humor and other personal characteristics which makes it unique to the individual. Deadpan humor is one of the most complex and to many enigmatic comedy styles as only a select few truly understand it enough to appreciate it for it’s brilliance.

Continue reading Dead Pan Humor

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George Carlin 

George Carlin
George Carlin
Politicians traditionally hide behind three things:

  • Flag
  • Bible
  • Children 
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Things that tell the truth


Small children

Drunk people 

And Yoga pants

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The Three blind mouseketeers -Disney’s silly symphony (1936)

The Three blind mouseketeers -Disney's silly symphony (1936)

All for one and one for all

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Looney Tunes – Pigs in a Polka 1943

Looney Tunes - Pigs in a Polka 1943

After an introduction by the wolf, the plot follows closely to the story of the three little pigs. The first pig erects a wire structure, then quickly bushels hay over the structure for the house. The second pig uses hundreds of matches to make up his house. The third pig goes through the tedious task of laying bricks

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java programming language

java

java
java

“Knock, knock.”

“Who’s there?”

[very long pause…]

“Java.”

😮

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Calendar formats

calendar formats
calendar formats
calendar formats

sine qua non (“But-for”)

pi
pi
Source: https://twitter.com/hansdemulder